The Wine of Douchebags

Hey there, jerk-stores, ass-bags and douche-buckets! Need to get your crunk on and want to look all fancy-like? Want to romance your lady with the nectar of roid-ragers and New Jersey stereotypes? Like to accessorize your alcohol with your water, t-shirts, car seats and air fresheners? Your booze ship has docked at the port!

Nothing compliments a night on the Jersey Shore like the crisp, metal-tinged bite of Ed Hardy Wine, perfect for dousing women with daddy issues and fueling violent outbursts that will lead to jail.

Your bottle service will be served with an extra heaping of tacky. House parties, nights on the town and barbecues will become that much more regrettable thanks to the malt liquor aftertaste of Ed Hardy Wine. And best of all, the scratch-and-sniff labels smell like AXE body spray — just like you!

Ed Hardy Wine:

Also goes great with the Ed Hardy Coffee Traveler Cup. Get your buzz on any time of the day!

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8 thoughts on “The Wine of Douchebags

  1. Does your website have a contact page? I’m having trouble locating it but, I’d
    like to shoot you an e-mail. I’ve got some recommendations for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great site and I look forward to seeing it grow over time.

    Like

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