Culinary Power Rankings – July 2013

culinary power rankings
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NOTE: I wrote this for consideration for McSweeney’s (a humor website) Lists section. It was obviously not selected.

1. Salted Caramel

Summer means that ice cream is in vogue, and this recent favorite is on the tongues of foodies everywhere. Look for it to dominate parlors and store shelves everywhere.

2. Lavender

This popular herb is showing up in everything from shortbread to muffins. It’s versatile in the savory and sweet, and it annihilates opposing flavor components with its fragrant bouquet.

3. S’mores

The American camping treat is experiencing a renaissance thanks to woodland trips in efforts to save money. Organic chocolate bars dominate the s’mores playing field with succulent, rich flavor; the waxy flavor of Hershey bars have them riding the bench.

4. Gravy

This Southern condiment to favorite comfort foods pairs best with starchy foods (biscuits, breads) and meats (turkey, beef), but don’t be afraid to put it as your starting dish. Its longevity as a breakfast and dinner companion makes it hard to beat.

5. Smelt

The diminutive silver fish hailing from the Pacific Northwest makes up for its small stature with muscular oil production. Smelt is a five-tool fish: its grease slathering everything from berries to salmon; it can be fried and grilled; and the Omega-3s are off the depth charts.

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