5 Things black people just don’t do anymore (that they should!)

There was a time where people’s opinions were kept to themselves and their nearest church bulletins. And then the internet happened. And shit went crazy.

Because of such craziness, we are now in an age where slightly dim folks can wax nostalgic for wholesome (segregated/sexist/hate-riddled) days gone by for all to see. And they can do so in so-called articles that can be mistaken for fact. But hey, First Amendment, man!

So let’s wax nostalgic! What other misguided notions can we pine for? I know! GET ME ON EXAMINER.COM!

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5 Things black people just don’t do anymore (that they should!)

 diary of a genial black manGenial Black Man

 Sociology Examiner

There was a time when a black person’s greatest job and accomplishment was serving the white person. The blacks of the 1977 miniseries Roots were a great example of what blacks were essentially expected to do. They worked the cotton fields, but they didn’t plan to farm (or even be seen as people in some cases). The plan was to serve their master as soon as possible, entertain them, and put those backs to use to hoist America via free labor! But today’s unshackled black person is certainly a different one! Many historical events have led to the evolution of the black role, and Kunta Kinte is now Mr./Mrs. Free Person! But just because certain “old-timey” ways of second-class citizenship have been phased out, it doesn’t mean that they should be retired. You can still be an emancipated black person and have your independent thoughts and whatnot, but maybe there are some things that blacks just don’t do anymore that they should!

Shuck and jive oneofus.net

Shuck and Jive

Some black folks these days don’t shuck and jive! Back in the day, black people had to throw white folks off their trails through lying and deception. It was mandatory. It pretty much taught you how to become an American citizen. You learned how to use codes, laugh to keep from crying, smile through the pain, take shit on the chin, and help your white master get extra money in their pocket! Nowadays, blacks only know how to shuck and jive if someone took them time to teach them how to shuck and jive. But if you’re a millennial (or older) and still don’t know how to shuck and jive, you better get started on some YouTube videos! Start with the most ignorant stuff and work your way up. You at least need to know how to make two or three white people feel a false sense of superiority.

Negro spirituals subversiveinfluence.com

Negro spirituals

Some people are singers and some are tone deaf and some are somewhere in between. But a lot of black people don’t really know how to sing Negro spirituals. A lot of black folks nowadays didn’t even sing Negro spirituals growing up. But even the ones who did sing Negro spirituals growing up feel like they’re more “independent” now and don’t have to do that anymore. Well you do! And while your white superiors should be able to be entertained by themselves, as the black person in their company or group of friends, you should be able to belt out a good rendition of “Swing Low Sweet Chariot.”

Picking cotton

Picking cotton georgiainfo.galileo.usg.edu

Blacks across the country in supermarkets and clothing stores can now be heard saying “They can pick their own cotton… ain’t nothing wrong with their hands…” (with some side eye). That is not right, black people! You should honor white people by picking their cotton. You don’t necessarily have to do it every time they want a t-shirt (because seriously, there is nothing wrong with their hands), but at least do it when you are in public as a sign of servitude. And no, it’s not demeaning. Have a servant’s heart. Respect and honor them, and they should return the favor!

Segregate via laws

segregated water fountains
Segregate via laws blog.ericharmatz.com

Blacks these days are integrated into society way too much! It used to be illegal to consort with other races in public (it technically still may be in some places). And a black person didn’t consort with other races in public. Nowadays, we’re all just hanging out with each other, calling each other co-workers and “some of my best friends” like it’s no big deal–like it’s a compliment! And some black people consort like independent white people. That is just not attractive. Try to refrain from consorting with other races, especially in certain situations–like maybe work, school, in front of Mexican-Americans, etc. Have some class!

Avoid white women

black men white women
Avoid white women africapublic.com

Black men used to really focus on “not being seen with white women” and always “drinking the sweet juice of black berries.” Always. At all times. There was no walking out in public with a white woman in friendship or a sign of respect. And there definitely was no being seen in public with a white woman in a romantic bond (or the 1950s equivalent). Nowadays, blacks are so comfortable and lax that they’ll just go out with any kind of white woman and don’t really invest effort in maintaining the separation of race and gender. Take care of your own women. You are a reflection of a white man’s world viewpoint. Make them not scared!     *** So what do you do? What is something black people just don’t do anymore that they should?

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