As you may have heard, this week included news reports of snippets from my past oopsie-daisies.
I have done many whoopsies and I am totes sorry that I’ve made my friends, family, fans, and financially bankrolled employees feel sadsies. My acts were wrong, and I can’t excuse it. I’m so sorry for my poopie-doodles.
Offering the passions of my brand, ritual, and camaraderie with you all, every Saturday night, is the biggest honor and pleasure of my life. Without your support, Lube Lovers, I wouldn’t have the forum to expand upon my love of seeing greased-up strangers slip and slide on their near-naked bodies.
I will work hard to make up for my doopie-scoodles and regain your faith and admiration in me and the Lube Party brand.
ps. in case you’re looking for a fun holiday gift to promote safe sex and a few laughs, these Amish condoms are a laff and a half.